!Too Wonderful for Me!
Psalm 139:1-6 O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. You scrutinize my path and my lying down, And are intimately acquainted with all my ways. Even before there is a word on my tongue, Behold, O Lord, You know it all. You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is too high, I cannot attain to it.
How wonderful?
Psalm 139:16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.
You SAW me and WROTE me into YOUR BOOK and ORDAINED (“decreed/ordered” Strong’s Concordance) ALL OF THEM.
!Before there was even one of them!
You SEARCHED me and KNEW me. EVERYTHING ABOUT me. The times I lived those days in worthless activity. The times I rose up against Your plan for my days. The times the words on my lips and the thoughts in my mind were beyond nasty, to You and to the saints You provided for my upbringing. The times I walked and laid down with those whom our enemy sent in order to SHOW YOU the sinner YOU created!
And still…
KNOWING IT ALL. You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. You have… a word that is past, present, and future… You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me… from the time YOU SAW me until the time YOU SEE me no more (?never?)! You have To INFINITY AND BEYOND!
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; It is too high, I cannot attain (be who You plan for me to be) to it.
KNOWING IT ALL… the good, the bad, the ugly that my nature freely chooses… You still CREATED ME and NEVER GIVE UP on me.
!Too wonderful for me!
But are You too GOOD TO BE TRUE?
There is a difference! Thank God, mankind’s perception IS NOT reality. (another blog discussion).
In the darkest days of my life, I believed along with some other idiots in my life, that my beliefs determined truth. I mean, one must “grow up and out of” the myths and fairy tales created in order to control the masses.
Who determines and declares what is or is not real?
Why those who are more intelligent (like me) than the masses (like you). Those who have “studied” the facts that, coincidentally I totally agree with. The “facts” that do not shake my confidence in how great I am. The “facts” that never demand I give up my own kingship and kingdom. The “facts” that allow me to imagine my mind, my judgement, my desires are always and only steeped in the reality I have created.
The “FACTS” that testify I AM IN CONTROL! (Talk about myths and fairy tales…)
I believed!
Until I met and knew The Truth, and He set me free! (John 8:32)
“I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.” (John 14:6)
The Way… we did our thing and ended up driven out of Paradise so we would not do the unthinkable and make Hell our only option. Jesus came and fulfilled God’s redemption by paying the price of our sinful way (the wages of sin is death).
The Truth… we cannot redeem ourselves because there is none without sin, and because sin is anything less than perfectly righteous. I am a “good” person… you may be but you will never be good enough to defeat death – for yourself or anyone else. ONLY God (Perfect Righteousness) could defeat death and pay our price.
Romans 5:6-8 For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
The Life… But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. (John 1:12-13)
I once was lost… many will tell you (some even in my own family) I am still lost in a world of fantasy of my own making.
I will tell you that I use to believe as they do. IF there was a god, I wanted NOTHING TO DO with someone who treated me and my world so badly by allowing such wicked things to happen.
But now I’m found… Jesus stood at my door and knocked… I opened it. I sat down with Him and asked Him all my hard questions.
“What have YOU done for me lately?”
“I paid your bill that is due immediately upon leaving this earth!”
“What bill? I’m a GOOD GIRL!”
“Except that time you weren’t!”
“Why me? You know I will be a handful, I demand my own way a lot! I throw tantrums when told no! I bargain even when I know I’ve lost!”
“I knew you before I created you. I knew you after I created you. And I will know you forever and a day!”
But, why me? I never loved You before, I fear I will never love You enough!”
“But God… so loved you and the world… He gave Me, His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Me, shall not perish, but have eternal life.”
“And I… CAME!”
All those myths and fairytales and imaginations (which I DID BELIEVE IN), had one thing in common. They were mine! I set them up on my altar to honor me. None of them EVER came to my rescue. None of them EVER proved their reality (they couldn’t because they were only a player in my perception), I made them up as I needed them. None of them EVER knocked on my door to dine with me (which would’ve been eating in front of a mirror). All of them came to make me feel good/better about myself because I or someone else had let the truth about me slip and judgement came flooding in.
Jesus came… not to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. (John 3:17)
O men of little faith, your belief has never, does not now, nor never will determine REALITY. The most we can say about it is… “IT IS WHAT IT IS!”.
Our God IS (the Great I AM) whether you or I believe He is or not.
But if you believe… and receive Him for ALL He is… But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. You will be changed!
It’s… !Too Wonderful for Me!
All I have left to say is…
Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there be any hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.
**All Scripture quoted comes from the “Bible Gateway” app and is the NASB version of the Bible unless otherwise noted.